Show and Tell Me

Please click through to Amy Timberlake's blog Show and Tell Me to read the story (and see a larger image) of this terrible thing to the right. But suffice it to say that yes, it is a picture of a zombie throwing up a smaller zombie.

The Comic-Con

A Short Play by Adam Rex
Based on True Events

A hall in San Diego. An attractive woman dress'd and undress'd in the guise of slave Leia poses for photographs. Three rogues look on.

ROGUE ONE: Not hot, methinks this counterfeit of Princess Leia be.

ROGUE TWO: Forsooth, my friend speaks verily: not so hot is she.

ROGUE THREE: FAIL.

Rogues Exeunt.

FIN

Comic-Con Signing

Previously I mentioned I'll be participating on a panel at Comic-Con. I just want to say today that I'll also be signing in the Autograph Area after my panel, and giving away FAT VAMPIRE t-shirts to the first fifteen people in my line (who want one).

The t-shirt graphic looks like the image up left. My signing is in AA1 from 12-1 pm. See you there!

Okay, I'm Back

Just a quick note to say that I'll be at the San Diego Comic-Con in support of my new book, FAT VAMPIRE.

On Sunday from 11-12:00 I'll be participating in a panel called Entertaining One's Inner Child in room 24ABC. Also participating will be Matt and Jennifer Holm (Babymouse), David Steinberg (Daniel Boom), Jimmy Gownley (Amelia Rules), Sina Grace (Among the Ghosts), and Greg Van Eekhout (Kid vs. Squid).

I'll also just be wandering around most of Saturday and Sunday, so if you see me please say hi. I'll be the guy who looks like me.

Sorry.

Okay, it seems I owe some of you an apology.

Ever since Adam died I’ve been insisting that he absolutely is NOT one of the legion of the undead, but then he stopped by last night and sort of broke it to his mother and me. It’s not a choice he made, it’s just who he is now. I think we’ll get used to it, in time.

And I guess he really has written a vampire book. He gave us a copy, which he insisted we begin reading immediately while he watched us with those smoldering eyes of his. I like it all right, but it’s not really his mother’s cup of tea.

Maybe you people will like it better. Here's an excerpt.

Adam’s mom wants me to take down that last post, but I can’t figure out how. She wants everyone to know that her son was very successful. Maybe not as successful as he would have been had he followed his father into engineering–ask me how many homicidal goth copyeditors have visited me lately at Honeywell–but I guess that’s water under the bridge.

Heh. Water under the bridge. You know some legends say vampires can’t cross water? I read it on Wikipedia. A little dead son vampire humor, there.

God, you people are getting to me.

Adam's Dad Again, and This is the Last Time.

You people. You people with your sick rumors. For the last time:

Adam has NOT returned from the dead to shop around a new vampire novel. I don’t even know where to begin telling you what’s wrong with that idea. To start with Adam simply would not write a vampire story–it’s not his style. And with the YA and Adult market already oversaturated with other people’s vampire stories? It would be ridiculous.

Please show some respect for the dead.

We’ve heard about the book too, but I’m sure it’s just by another author with the same name, or else some sicko trying to cash in on our boy’s death. The joke’s on you, mister sicko. None of Adam’s books ever made any money.

Adam's Dad Again

Hi, Adam’s dad again.

I’d like to say right off the bat that Adam’s mother and I don’t appreciate all the rumors flying around the internet about Adam being killed in some supernatural way. I’m a man of science and I don’t believe in such things.

Yes, he was found in his car yesterday, nude and completely exsanguinated. On his chest there was a message in blood that read “YOU USE TOO MANY COMMAS,” so of course police are looking for that copyeditor gal.

I thank all of you who posted thoughtful emails and comments. To the rest of you I say: knock it off with all your “advice.” We are not going to cut Adam’s head off and fill the mouth with holy wafers. We’re Presbyterian.

Message from Adam's Dad

Hi, this is Adam’s dad.

If you read this blog then you’re probably already aware of some of the stories getting around about him, but I want to set the record straight.

Adam was last seen at the Phoenix Book Festival in the company of what I’m told was “a fair-skinned and darkly beautiful young copyeditor.” She approached him after his signing and professed to be a big fan and brushed her slender hand against his. Phoenix in July is pretty warm, and Adam was heard to whisper that he could not account for the fractal chill that spread in his breast.

He’s always talking like that–you should have heard him when he was a teenager.

According to eyewitnesses he walked off with the beautiful copyeditor after she remarked that she wanted to share with him her “dark embrace.”

“Ha!” he was heard to say as they left. “For a moment I thought you said your ‘dork embrace.’ Huh…that would be a funny premise for a book.”

He hasn’t been seen since.

If anyone has any information, we’d appreciate it. He was supposed to come over last night for Jenga.

The Queen of the Quail

Baby gift for my friends Phil and Angie, and brand new friend Phinneas.

5x7, oil on paper.

Guys vs. Vampires

HarperCollins has created a facebook page for my new novel, FAT VAMPIRE: a Never Coming of Age Story. I'm sharing it with Eric Luper's excellent new book Seth Baumgartner's Love Manifesto, hence the name GUYS VS. VAMPIRES.

FAT VAMPIRE Trailer Three–Vampire or Teenager?

Inkpop Live Chat

If you're a member of the online teen writer community Inkpop, or know someone who is: I'll be having a live chat there Wednesday, July 7th, at 5pm eastern time. HERE'S THE LINK

FAT VAMPIRE Trailer Two–Vampire Hunters

FAT VAMPIRE Trailer One

Starring Mac Barnett and featuring Jon Korn. Directed by Shawn Harris. Written by Mac, Jon, and Shawn.

Clock Without a Face Update

Remember Clock Without a Face? If you don't, click here to see my previous posts about the book. Click here to visit the official website, and read stories about real treasure hunters who studied the book and were rewarded with emeralds. It occurred to me that I never posted my portrait of the world's greatest sleuth, Roy Dodge, so there he is on the left. Click to make bigger.

What I'm really excited about, however, is listening to authors Mac Barnett and Eli Horowitz talk about the book this morning on NPR's Weekend Edition. Listen to the story here. You'll also hear from one eighteen-year-old in southern Wisconsin who describes her successful search for the number eight.

There are still three numbers left in the ground! Including the twelve, which contains as many emeralds as all the other numbers combined! Emeralds! Okay, that's all.

Interview!

I couldn't think of a better title than that. Pretty good though, right? It's punchy, it says what it is.

Anyway, the anonymous editor of Editorial Anonymous conducted an interview with me recently and it's up right now on the blog. Go find out what I was talking about when I said "my own amateurish blindfolded plate-spinning might actually be a legitimate means to an end."

They Grow Up So Fast

Previously, I presented the pigeon nesting on my porch, and later the one-week-old results of her efforts. Here they are again, now no older than three weeks.

Mugwort Jon Smelly, and Bert Lane Rasputin.


And here they are again, a day later and with a different camera.


I also shot this of the parents, Penelope Van der Pigeon and Andrew Toodlewinks de la Xavier, who are now nesting on the other side of the porch.
Thank you all for the naming help.

BEA Comic

This is a bit of a last-minute reminder to those of you actually attending Book Expo America this week, But I'm in New York at the moment and my internet access has been spotty. I sign my next novel, Fat Vampire, today at ten o'clock. As evidenced in this little comic I created from an excerpt of a longer interview with Edward Nawotka for Publishing Perspectives. Hopefully the longer interview will be available soon–that web address they told me to include at the bottom of the comic doesn't seem to work.
Click to enlarge.

Nice Interview with Mac Barnett Over at SLJ

Link.

Where do Baby Pigeons Come From? They Come From My Porch.

Previously, I posted about a pigeon nesting on my porch. She produced a couple eggs, but frankly I didn't follow up on it because they turned out to be duds. I'm sure that's the correct term an ornithologist would use–duds. But the pigeon mother and father rebuilt the nest and tried again, and yesterday I noticed mother was absent for the first time in weeks. So I stood up on the porch railing and saw this:

I know they look huge compared to that egg on the left (another dud?), but a little internet research tells me they're not much more than a week old. I probably shouldn't get attached, but I would like y'all's help in naming them. Thank you.

Guys Read: Funny Business

San Diego People

I'll be at The Yellow Book Road this Thursday, the 6th, at 10am.

7200 Parkway Dr #118
La Mesa, CA 91942
619-463-4900

Bookie Woogie

I had a really fun time video-chatting with the Z-Kids from the blog Bookie Woogie the other day; and their dad, Aaron Zenz, just completed the harrowing task of transcribing our meandering conversation and posting it as an interview. So please go check out what Isaac, Gracie, Lily, and I (and Aaron) had to say to each other. illustration above of zombies at the zoo by Lily Zenz, age 7, based on the zombies from Frankenstein Makes a Sandwich by Adam Rex, age 36.

And the Rest...

Like the theme song from the first season of Gilligan's Island, I'm just going to cram all the other players from the book The Clock Without a Face into one final post. Seriously, you need to check out the link there if you haven't already. Find out all about this weird book, and let me know when you've uncovered one of the very real treasures that have been buried in twelve different spots across the United States of America.

Actually, I may be taking it for granted that all the treasures are in the U.S. One of them could be in Guam or Ontario for all I know. But I'm pretty sure they're in the U.S.

Anyway, for your consideration: the paranoiac,

the puzzle ladies,

the superfan,

the doormen,

the hamster-man,

the mime,

and the artist (encased in plaster).